Accomplishing the Truth

Hey!

Good Morning

Here

is

a question

Why does the completion of a task simulate its answer?

If I’m wondering about something, writing about it is apparently enough to satisfy me without even finding a surefire answer

My writing doesn’t even have to be thorough

Just, clever

I think

I’m honestly not sure what my standards for my own work are

but I’ll say this

When Paul of Tarsus recorded his revelations, I can’t imagine he expected what ended up on paper…

Like that was some crazy juju
Ooh
ya

Something inside of me demands a certain level of output in order to be at rest once again

And that, I believe, is the mystery of creative inspiration

one of them, at least

Here is what I know

Sometimes I am tortured by my desire to know

Almost as much as I am by the number of seasons it takes for Shawn and Juliet to start dating

great show

But frustrating

As crime dramas can be

Comedies?

mm

I’ve heard it both ways

But

Not factual knowledge

Rather

The knowledge through which the answers are attainable

The knowledge of God.

And my point is

I stop short of that

Every day

Specifically, in all my creative endeavors

I settle for something satisfactory

Not necessarily true

Certainly not something certain. Ah.

As if I found the answer in myself

and it is by no means concrete but hey if the voice inside me urged and these are words I found to best describe the things it is communicating then well standards met it’ll do

I simply question whether truth is something accomplishable and/or convertible into task form

And there’s another reason I wonder about this

In the past,

I can think of specific things that I struggled with

One in particular, actually, is on my mind but there are more

This one was a song that that I wrote that addressed a concern that I had about how I should structure my pursuits in the world

Specifically, it questioned how goodness and ambition could be compatible, if at all

And I faced this conflict around freshman/Sophomore year (of high school) I think

Anyways, the dilemma dissipated once I became satisfied with the song

I wasn’t satisfied with the answer!

But that didn’t matter

heck I wasn’t even thinking about that

But the song helped me think things through enough that I realized

1) it’s a complex issue

2) it’s been on my mind enough and I’ve written and struggled through it enough that I can trust myself to sense out what is better or worse in particular situations moving forward

And I realized those things semi-consciously it seems

meaning I realized them without realizing that I realized them

Thus they quickly faded into the background to join the comradery of other previous conclusions pulling strings unbeknownst to me

Now, I’m realizing these things consciously

Which I suspect is how it’s supposed to be

The problem isn’t solved

But I’m still living life, which means the problem isn’t fully confronted nor spelled out yet

So of course it isn’t solved!

And I shouldn’t wish it to be!

And I should not treat creative phenomena with suspicion

If I “accomplish the truth” without properly identifying and articulating a specific end-all be-all answer

Then that’s good – that’s how it works

These things are a process

And the confrontation acts as an answer because it facilitates thought

And the utter relief I experience when I put my gritty tears of intellect on paper must not be questioned nor considered invalid or inferior to a thorough rationality

They are justified and necessary by virtue of the fact that I have not the answer in the first place


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