..diary? ’tis the season

No!

I will not entertain your game

Where can I direct my energy?

Is this article worth continuing?

I should probably delete this and head to a different one that needs writing

I will not act how you want me to act

It is a threat to my process

I will maintain my silence!

I don’t know if it’s complacency!

I’m wrong in a million ways!

But until I can prove that you aren’t

I will walk my path!

Let me have my mistakes and my shame

Let me trod with my shoulders in my knees

trampling my heart under every step

it has ants all over it

my heart

imagine that

watching ants tear away small bits at a time until they’ve devoured your vitalest flesh upon the ground

step on it

again

hearts reemerge up from the dirt for every step

the game continues

the confusion

rises

crescendos

screams

the ants decrescendo

Pain’s preferable to defeat

I’ll eat the grass

where my heart was

chew my dirt

cause I don’t know what’s real


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